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That itchy lack of closure

There is this feeling that hits at the end of a show.

You thank the audience and they leave in applause.
Then it's quiet for a bit.

You realise that you should have done it a couple more times.
You realise that not everyone involved in the production will work together again.

You feel like your work is too good to have only been seen that many times.
Like there were flaws that could have been corrected so that the show would become better.
You dream of Broadway.
You dream of being good enough.
You dream you could make money doing a hundred shows.
And then a hundred more.

You want to have a few more hours with the people you've come to like a whole lot.



This struck me 2 weeks after my show. The longest it has. And it keeps me up for a few moments.
I didn't want it to end.

I don't want any of it to end.


but it has, and they will, forever and ever and ever.
And things are never enough, and life is never enough, and I will try and fail to find the neatest little bow to tie around the neatest little parts of my life.

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